The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door.

Dear Dogs and Cats:



The dishes on the floor with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate does not mean that is is suddenly your food, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.



The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the top of the stairs is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.



I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space that you are taking up, is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine/feline attendance is not required.

The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door: TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:

(1) They live here. You don't.

(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.

(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.

(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.

Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

(1) eat less,

(2) don't ask for money all the time,

(3) are easier to train,

(4) normally come when called,

(5) never ask to drive the car,

(6) don't hang out with drug-using people;

(7) don't smoke or drink,

(8) don't want to wear your clothes,

(9) don't have to buy the latest fashions,

(10) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and

(11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

Views: 128

Comment

You need to be a member of Pugslife to add comments!

Join Pugslife

Comment by Pam & Pugs :0) on June 3, 2011 at 11:35am
LOL...I love it!  Especially the secret exit in the bathroom part.  We call the girls our "potty pals"!  :0)
Comment by Mum to Her Royal Muffiness on March 8, 2011 at 5:03am
This cracked me up and its SOOOO true!
Comment by Pugman! on January 29, 2011 at 8:22pm
How do you like that Terri, I read this thing when you first posted it and never commented on it, got to doing other stuff and never got back to it.  Just like a man huh?  Shame on me!
Comment by ken vandergrift on January 29, 2011 at 5:53pm
Thats an old one, but still pretty funny, & true :)
Comment by Helena Brown on January 24, 2011 at 2:44am
So true, so absolutely true. I am fortunate all my friends know they would get short shrift if they complain about the King.
Comment by Di's spoiled kids on January 23, 2011 at 12:59pm
So true, couldn't have said it better myself especially the part about the people coming to the house to visit.  I have a sister in law who hates my dogs, so she doesn't like to visit.  Oh well, they are part of my family, so if you want to see family, they need to be included.  I really try to keep them away from her, but she says things like I am not going to sit until they calm down, duh the more you stand the more they do not understand why you are moving around, just sit down.
Comment by julie foutch on January 23, 2011 at 1:05am
very good i like it it is funny and cute as i agree.
Comment by Pugnacious on January 23, 2011 at 12:27am
Oh my god...im laughing histarically..this is toooo funny but so true,love it!

REACH 5,000 members

Advertise on Pugslife and reach out to over 5,000 pug owners.  All day, every day.

 

For more information, contact Christine London-Camper

 

We just Love PUGS!!

Sasha Says. . .



Sasha is our resident pug. When she's not napping, she likes to talk. and talk. and talk! Pug health. Pug training. Pug trivia. Pug, pug, pug ... all the time!

Do you know all about pugs? Not until you hear what Sasha Says.

Pugslife shirts

All proceeds go to help keep PUGSLIFE growing

Latest Activity

Sophie posted a photo
Tuesday
Sophie posted photos
Tuesday
Sophie commented on Helena Brown's photo
Thumbnail

Hektor 2

"Hello beautiful hektor! How is he doing? I've been away for so long"
Tuesday
Helena Brown posted a photo

Hektor 2

Hektor at our Independence rally last year
Nov 8
PugPapa posted photos
Oct 25
PugPapa updated their profile
Oct 25
Nikki M Andruschak Neal liked julie foutch's blog post A Pugslife Of Today
Sep 8
Pam & Pugs :0) commented on PugPapa's blog post My Puggies
"Love these pug pics.  Gee, you'd think you liked pugs!  :)"
Sep 3
Pam & Pugs :0) replied to Christine London-Camper's discussion Hey Pug family!!!!
"Moving is such a hard thing for humans AND pugs!  Glad all is well. I was chatting with Julie on FB and she said Pugslife has lots of new friends.  Great to see all the pug pics.  "
Sep 3
Pam & Pugs :0) liked Christine London-Camper's discussion Hey Pug family!!!!
Sep 3
Pam & Pugs :0) posted a status
"Wow, I haven't been here for a while. Just needed to revisit some fun pug friends."
Sep 3

© 2019   Created by Christine London-Camper.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service